We got the happy news this week that Nick Pennino, my sister's oldest son, proposed to Beth (pictured here), his "steady" for some time now. I believe he proposed to her on Friday, December 5, 2008, and she said "yes" the same day!!! The Glenn family here in Pittsburgh has met Beth only a couple of times and all impressions were VERY positive (just so you know, Beth!).
The whole family was very excited and by means of this blog we our very best wishes to Beth and extend our congratulations to Nick.
Along these lines, we had a good discussion at dinner the other night and I asked the kids what type of advice they would give to Nick or Beth. Hmmm? Interesting the responses.
Evelyn: "She's always right!"
Meredith: "I like her. What Evelyn said and never put her down."
Clint: "Don't get married." (He was just kidding...but he didn't have any serious advice.)
Ellen: "I refuse to comment."
Mary didn't have time to comment. Too much talking by the kids.
Doug: Ditto Mary's situation, but since Doug's the one typing this blog, he has the great privilege of typing out his advice . Here goes.....
To Nick.....
- Truly loving Beth involves the willing, premeditated sacrifice of all you hold dear for Beth's sake. (Not a platitude. List the things you like the most and plan on sacrificing those exact things for Beth, even if she doesn't ask you to. If you don't want to or think you can't, see the next item.)
- You can't. Not on your own. You won't be able to maintain the "want to" on your own even if you have it now! Ongoing "want to" only comes from God -- it's super-natural if you will. Now, here's the sticky part. God only gives ongoing "want to" to His friends. So look up John 15:14 and see what you have to do to be His friend.
- Real men go to church and take their wife with them (preferably a good reformed Presbyterian church--I'm serious--the RIGHT church makes a huge difference), take it seriously, and stick with it for life.
- Love one person more than Beth..."no" not you! Love Christ more than Beth. She'll love you for it (ultimately) because a man who truly loves Christ is a passionate lover, protector and defender of his wife.
- It's all about Beth now, not you.
Now my advice to Beth.
- Your perfect, (not really -- no one is, but as far as marriages go, it is usually the guy who messes up), so be yourself.
- If anything goes wrong in your marriage it is Nick's fault.
- Guard your heart against all other loves.
- Respect your husband. It's more important than loving him. (Kinda odd isn't it! Men are weird.)
A good marriage, the way God made it, is the best thing that can happen to two people. Even a good marriage NOT the way God intended it is tolerable, but nothing like a true godly message.
Advice to BOTH:
- establish good habits early -- most specifically, go to church the first Sunday you are married and commit to going every Sunday with few exceptions. I'm serious. Just do it. I'll be asking.
Go Penn State. I'll be watching the Rose Bowl.